Tips to turn them into instant BFFs

The sibling bond is one of the strongest connections we can make; it provides a sense of stability, helps us learn skills to navigate relationships, and teaches healthy emotional attachments.

But welcoming a new baby into the fold is a big life change. For the first few months, your tiny one will need almost all of your attention. We asked our Littleworld writer, Kim Brandt, to share her 7 tips to make the transition easier – so that older kids know they’re still completely loved and a priority.

When we brought our newborn home, her sister said, “What is going on here?” and we realised we had dropped the ball. So, here’s how to create a lifetime of love.

1. INTRODUCE YOUR CHILD TO THEIR SIBLING EVEN BEFORE BABY IS BORN

1. INTRODUCE YOUR CHILD TO THEIR SIBLING EVEN BEFORE BABY IS BORN Encourage your older child to talk to, sing to, or read stories to your baby bump – things they see around them, their favourite toys and all the adventures they’ll share together. Let them give baby a special nickname. Also, let them feel all the baby kicks – they’ll be delighted that there’s a real little person in there.

2. PREPARE YOUR HOME AHEAD OF TIME

Your toddler may be moving into their new room to make way for the nursery. To avoid your eldest feeling as if they’re being “kicked out”, involve them in the decoration of their new space. They can choose the theme, bedding, toys, décor, and their new bed. This will help minimise any anxiety they feel and make the big change exciting. Keep as much of your old routine as possible – like bedtime stories or cuddling them to sleep.

3. PLAN THAT FIRST MEETING

You might imagine that your older child and new baby will become instant BFFs, but it may not be all hugs and butterfly kisses from the get-go. Greet your toddler first, and don’t hold the baby for the initial introduction. Have them in the car seat or bassinet for a neutral introduction. Don’t force it – if they don’t want to hold the baby, that’s OK, it will come with time. Let them ask questions and explore this new little being. Take their mood and feelings into account. A meet and greet when they’re cranky before a nap may not be a great idea.

4. GIVE A MEANINGFUL GIFT

This attention for baby can make toddlers feel neglected, left out, and even jealous. Remind them of just how special they still are. Give them a gift that “the baby picked out for them” to help them warm up to your newborn. It can be an animal plushie, or book you created about how excited they are to meet their new best friend. Or vice versa – let your toddler give a gift to the new arrival.

5. LET THEM HELP

Some older kids are eager to help. Give them a special tasks e.g. You are Captain Changing Time, so it’s your job to get nappies, wipes or bum cream. If your child isn’t interested, give them space until they’re ready.

6. AVOID “BIG KID” LANGUAGE

Kiddos might respond negatively to being told they are suddenly a “big kid”. Afterall, they’re still babies themselves. Tell them both children are now your babies. If your older child needs you and the baby is crying, try saying, “Baby please wait, your big sister/brother/sibling needs me too.”

7. HAVE SPECIAL TIME WITH YOUR OLDER CHILD

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